For selecting a life partner, people are likely to either settle for boring compatibility or confuse attraction for love. While they are important factors for a long-lasting relationship, neither is enough. Love and compatibility are two different things though they are often confused with one another. Being intensely attracted to someone doesn’t always translate to a thriving partnership. Getting along with someone doesn’t mean your relationship can blossom into romance if only you try hard enough to muster up desire.
Most importantly, having a particular set of traits doesn’t mean you’re compatible with another person, though this is how we attempt to determine a suitable life partner. Compatibility is a disposition, a willingness to grow together. It is mostly triggered by attraction as we find to build “compatibility” with people whom we find irresistible. Dating coaches glance over the concepts of chemistry and compatibility, assuming that most people have an intuitive understanding of these concepts. While people use these concepts interchangeably, they are two different concepts. Understanding the difference is crucial to have a long-lasting, healthy relationship.
Compatibility is the positioning of the life choices and values of two people. A highly educated person wouldn’t be compatible with a drug dealer. Chemistry on the other hand is the connection of two individuals at an emotional or spiritual level. While compatibility and chemistry may sound like two sides of the same coin, they are not. High chemistry results in emotional intensity whereas compatibility without chemistry results in a boring and complacent bond. According to a marriage expert, the bottom line is that there is no such thing as a compatible couple. All couples disagree over the basics. In the presence of chemistry, one has to convince the other of compatibility as well. But in reality, couples create compatibility by living together.
